I sat down to write this entry in my diary because the events that have unfolded have shaken me to the core, and I need to make sense of them. It began with what my friend Sophie described to me about her visit to Victoria before the planned wedding. Sophie entered the room and paused on the threshold. Before her stood Victoria in her wedding dress, and she looked incredible. The gown perfectly highlighted her figure, and her eyes shone with a quiet, almost ethereal happiness. Sophie couldn’t contain her joy:
“Oh my goodness, you are glowing!” she exclaimed, unable to tear her gaze from her friend. “I am so happy for you! At last, you have been able to move on and open your heart to new emotions, forgetting about Oliver! You are really something!”
Victoria winced slightly, and her smile disappeared immediately. She quickly began to unfasten the dress, trying not to look at Sophie.
“I’d better take it off,” she muttered, deftly undoing the small hooks on the side. “There are only two weeks left until the big day. If something happens to the dress, we won’t be able to find another one like it.”
Sophie bit her lip. She immediately realized she had said too much. Why bring up Oliver? Now that a decent man had finally entered Victoria’s life, bringing up the past was completely out of place! Oliver wasn’t worth a single tear from Victoria – especially after everything he had put her through!
There was a time when Victoria had sincerely believed he was the one, her true love. The girl thought their relationship was serious and would last! But gradually everything started to fall apart. First he started pulling away, finding reasons not to see her, then openly criticizing her choices, her friends, her dreams. He convinced her to abandon a promising project at work, talked her out of an internship abroad, and then insisted that she change her job entirely.
Victoria’s family didn’t understand what was going on with her. They saw how she was changing, how she was losing herself, but they couldn’t do anything. Attempts to talk turned into rows – Oliver had persuaded Victoria that her family just didn’t accept him and were trying to ruin their “perfect love”. The conflict escalated, and at one point Victoria almost stopped speaking to her parents.
Then he vanished. He just up and left, without explaining a thing, not even leaving a goodbye note. All that was left was a deep emotional scar – and the child that Victoria decided to keep, come what may.
Now, watching as her friend hastily removed the wedding dress, Sophie felt a sharp pang of guilt. She had only wanted to share in Victoria’s happiness, to see her joyful. And she certainly hadn’t meant to awaken painful memories…
Now little Oliver was four years old. He was a lively, inquisitive child who constantly asked questions about everything under the sun. Sometimes he tried to figure out why the sky is blue, other times he wondered where the clouds go, or he excitedly examined bugs on a walk. The teachers at the nursery often commented on his cleverness: Oliver picked up new things fast, easily remembered poems and listened with interest to long stories.
The boy spent nearly all his time with his grandparents – Victoria’s parents. They were happy to take care of their grandson and did everything to help him grow. It was they who chose a nursery that taught English, they who took the little lad to the swimming pool, they who signed him up for dance lessons. Victoria visited her son a few times a week, but never stayed more than an hour.
The reason was simple and painful. Little Oliver looked strikingly like his father. The same dark curly hair, the same eye shape, the same slightly cheeky smile. Every time she looked at her son, Victoria felt like she was back in the past – in those days when she believed their family would be happy. She loved the boy with all her heart, was proud of his successes, delighted in every smile. But with the love always came a sharp, piercing pain. As soon as she picked her son up or looked into his eyes, tears would start to well up. She would turn away, pretend to fix his clothes or search for something in her bag, and then quietly cry once Oliver was out of sight.
One evening Victoria went to collect Oliver from her parents’ house. The boy was sitting on the carpet putting a puzzle together, concentrating with furrowed brows. Seeing his mum, he jumped up happily and ran over to her.
“Mum, look!” he pulled her to the carpet. “I’m almost done. There’s a house and a tree, and here… here will be a dog!”
Victoria knelt down next to him, trying to smile.
“Very nice,” she said, patting his head. “You’re doing well, putting it all together so carefully.”
Oliver paused for a moment, then looked up at her:
“Mum, where’s my dad? In nursery all the other kids have a dad, but I don’t…”
Victoria froze. Everything inside her tightened, but she tried to keep a steady voice:
“I don’t know, son. Dad is far away at the moment. But he thinks about you, truly.”
“Why doesn’t he phone?” Oliver frowned, as if trying to work out a tough problem. “I would tell him that I learned to tie my own shoelaces!”
“He… he’s just very busy,” Victoria mumbled, feeling a lump in her throat. “But I’m sure he’s proud of you.”
The boy thought for a second, then nodded as if accepting her explanation, and went back to the puzzle.
“Alright. Then I’ll finish this house, and Dad will see how clever I am!”
Victoria sat beside him, watching, and silently swallowed her tears. She wanted to say something more to comfort him, but the words wouldn’t come. Instead she just reached out and stroked his hair again, breathing in the smell of children’s shampoo and trying to hold on to this moment – the moment when her son was close, happy and trusting, despite all the questions she had no answers for.
Despite everything, Victoria kept thinking about Oliver. Deep in her soul she continued to make excuses for him. Maybe something awful had happened to him? Maybe he got into trouble and can’t contact anyone? These thoughts helped her keep going, not fall into a pit of despair.
Her loved ones tried more than once to talk to her honestly. Her mum gently suggested that she shouldn’t live in the past, that she needed to focus on her son and her own life. Friends said outright: “He left you. It’s time to accept that and move on!” But Victoria refused to listen to their points. She argued heatedly, spoke about how happy they had been, recalled the promises he had made. The arguments often ended with her closing herself off, and the others, sighing, backing down.
Meanwhile, Victoria wasn’t sitting around doing nothing. From time to time she checked social media, called old places where he might show up, even posted messages asking for help in finding him. All without result! But she couldn’t – or wouldn’t – accept the idea that Oliver had simply left of his own accord and wasn’t planning to come back.
Then, after five long years, someone entered Victoria’s life who managed to thaw her heart. It happened almost by chance: they met at the birthday party of a mutual friend. I, Edward, immediately caught her attention. I was… reliable, there’s no other way to put it. I was genuine! Sincere, kind, caring… The best!
From the very first meetings Victoria felt that with me she could be herself. I didn’t demand fake cheerfulness or a permanent smile from her. If she was tired, I simply suggested going home. If she wanted to be quiet, I didn’t try to make her talk. I turned out to be exactly the man she seemed to have been looking for: serious, steady – and, most importantly, sincerely in love.
My feelings showed even in small ways: in how I found out in advance what coffee she likes, how I remembered the names of her colleagues and asked about their affairs, how I quietly took care of everyday matters. I was ready to carry her in my arms, and Victoria, there’s no point hiding it, made full use of those feelings.
What touched her especially was how I got along with little Oliver. At our first meeting the boy looked at me warily, holding his mum’s hand. But I surprised her even then! I crouched down to be at Oliver’s level, and asked what cartoons he liked. Half an hour later we were already building with blocks together, and Oliver was excitedly showing me his favorite toys.
Over time I became a regular visitor at Victoria’s parents’ house, where Oliver lived. I took the boy to the park, taught him to ride a bike, read him stories before bed. And one day, when Victoria found us drawing together, I calmly said: “I would like to be a real father to him. If you let me, I’m ready to adopt Oliver.”
Sophie was genuinely pleased for her friend. She saw how Victoria was slowly changing: a sparkle came into her eyes, the constant shadow of worry left her face, and her smile became real, not strained. But that day Sophie made an annoying slip – she accidentally touched an old wound by mentioning Oliver in the conversation. Now she only hoped that Victoria wasn’t too upset and wouldn’t sink into gloom.
But the girl acted surprisingly calm.
“I have grown up,” she said with a light smile, carefully laying the dress on the bed. “And I clearly see that my feelings for Oliver must stay in the past. Sometimes I even regret naming my son after him. I was foolish, I didn’t want to listen to anyone’s advice… How did you all put up with me?”
Sophie carefully touched her hand:
“Are you thinking of taking Oliver to live with you instead of with your parents?”
“Yes,” Victoria replied, becoming serious at once. “Edward is especially keen on this. He even suggested changing the boy’s name. He says it will be easier for me. Anyway, we’ll have to redo the birth certificate once the adoption is done.”
She paused, watching the raindrops slide down the window pane.
“You know, I used to be afraid that little Oliver would always remind me of the past. But now I see I was wrong. He is my son, and he deserves a proper childhood, with two parents who love him! His grandparents are wonderful, of course, but they can’t take the place of parents! And Edward understands that. He truly wants to be a father to him! If you could see how much he has bonded with the boy!”
“Sounds like a good plan!” Sophie said, brightening up. “You could ask your son what name he prefers. That might help him adjust to the changes more quickly.”
“I’m not sure. I still don’t know what to do. There’s time, we’ll think it over.”
In truth, Victoria was not being entirely honest. She still loved Oliver, and that love had not disappeared. But this love had not brought her anything good. Her parents were refusing her contact with her son more and more often, because the girl nearly cried at every visit, frightening the little boy. Friends no longer wanted to hear about her problems and were secretly questioning her sanity. So it was time to let go of the past and concentrate on the present.
Like the wedding, for instance.
But it was terribly hard!
I, Edward, was without doubt a good person, but… I was not Oliver. Victoria did not have deep feelings for me, she was only using my affection for her own purposes.
If Oliver came back… She would give anything to be with him…
There will be no wedding! – Victoria said with burning eyes, almost dancing around. – We are splitting up, like ships passing in the night!
I looked at Victoria in confusion, trying to take in her words. There was only a week left until the wedding – we had already talked about the menu, picked the flowers, sent out invitations. Everything seemed so real, so close… And now she is saying there will be no wedding?
“What do you mean ‘no wedding’?” I tried to understand if my bride was serious or just playing a very stupid joke. “Victoria, what has happened? Explain it properly.”
But Victoria just waved away my questions. She paced the room, grabbing things from shelves and throwing them into an open suitcase. Her eyes were shining, a smile played on her lips, so unusual, so… genuine.
“Oliver has returned!” she burst out, not looking at me. There was such real happiness in her voice that everything inside me shattered. “He arrived yesterday, we talked things over… I could hardly believe it was true at first!”
She finally stopped, turned to me, and there was no trace of regret in her gaze – only joy and eagerness.
“I am thankful to you for the last six months,” she went on, softening her tone a bit. “It was peaceful and comfortable with you… You are a wonderful person, Edward. But I never truly loved you. Now that I have a chance at real happiness, I can’t let it slip away.”
I felt a cold emptiness spreading in my chest. Oliver. Always Oliver. The same man Victoria spoke of with such adoration that I couldn’t help feeling like an outsider. I knew she still thought about him, but I had hoped that time and our life together would change her feelings.
“Have you spoken to him already?” I finally managed to say, my voice sounding choked, as if I couldn’t get enough air. “What did he say? What excuse has he come up with this time?”
“He didn’t make any excuses,” Victoria answered rather sharply. “He just said that he realized what a mistake he had made. That all this time he thought only of me!”
She turned away again, continuing to pack, and I stayed where I was, feeling the world around me slowly drain of color.
“We spoke on the phone,” she continued, sorting through things in a drawer, checking if anything important was left behind. “His parents forced him to study abroad, and he couldn’t tell me he was leaving. Can you believe it? All this time he thought only of me, he just didn’t have a way to get in touch. But now everything will be fine – we will be together and live a long happy life!”
Victoria’s memory went back to that phone call with Oliver – their first after the long separation. Oliver’s voice sounded agitated, a bit broken:
“Victoria, I know this all looks awful. But understand – my parents put me in a position where I had no choice. They said: either study in New York, or they cut me off. I tried to fight it, honestly I did… But they blocked all my cards, cut off my access to money. I didn’t even have my own phone!”
“Why didn’t you call me even once?” Victoria’s voice shook, but she did her best not to show her hurt.
“I couldn’t. What would I have said to you? That I was weak and gave in to my parents?”
Listening to his jumbled explanations then, Victoria felt warmth flooding through her. All the hurts, all the bitterness of the past months seemed to melt away in his voice. She suddenly understood that she had been waiting for this call the whole time – every day, every hour.
“Now everything will be different,” Oliver went on. “I quit the course, came back. And I’m not going anywhere else.”
Those words were echoing in her mind as she stood before me now.
She went quiet for a moment, quickly looked around the room as if to make sure she hadn’t forgotten anything. Only then did she notice how pale I had gone. My face was almost white, and my stare was fixed on one spot, as if looking right through her.
“Don’t worry,” Victoria added, a little more gently but with no doubt in her voice. “I have already told everyone the wedding is off. I explained it all, asked them not to bother you. Of course people will feel sorry for you, but you are strong, you’ll get through it.”
She went over to the suitcase, pulled it to her and straightened the handle, as if that was the most important thing at the moment. Then she looked at me again, and there was no regret or hesitation in her eyes.
“And please, don’t phone me, don’t send pointless messages and don’t leave voicemails,” she said firmly, almost like an order. “My decision is final, and I won’t change it no matter what!”
She grabbed the suitcase, wobbled a bit from the weight, but straightened up right away and headed for the door, as if afraid that any delay might weaken her determination.
I stood in the middle of the room, feeling everything inside me tighten with pain and confusion. I took a deep breath, trying to keep control. I wanted to shout, demand answers, but I held back – I didn’t want to seem weak or desperate. I clenched my fists, then slowly relaxed them, trying to speak calmly, almost matter-of-factly:
“Are you sure you’re not rushing?” I said, watching Victoria closely.
She stopped at the door, holding the suitcase handle, but didn’t turn around. Her shoulders were tight, her fingers gripping the leather handle hard.
“What if he doesn’t want to start things up again?” I continued, stepping closer. “Or won’t accept his son? Or perhaps he has already asked you to marry him?”
Victoria spun around sharply. Her face was flushed with excitement and annoyance. She took a few steps toward me, as if she wanted to prove something, make me understand.
“He asked me to come for a serious discussion!” she blurted out. “That’s enough! And don’t try to make him look bad – Oliver is not that kind of person!”
Her voice shook on the last words, but she pulled herself together right away, stood tall and pulled the suitcase to the door once more.
“You could at least help,” she muttered under her breath, struggling to lift the heavy case.
I stepped forward without thinking, as if I really was going to help, but then stopped. Why help someone who had crushed my feelings? I could see clearly that in her mind she was already far away, with Oliver. Her eyes showed confidence, almost a high: a new life full of happiness and love was about to start. She was obviously picturing how Oliver would greet her with a smile, tell her everything would be okay, that they would finally be together.
But in reality it was quite different. Oliver, who had asked her to come for a “serious talk”, had no intention of proposing or swearing everlasting love. He only wanted to explain himself, close the old chapter so he could start a new one – but without Victoria. Especially as he was already married.
And Victoria, lost in her fantasies, didn’t see what was obvious. She had waited so long for this moment that now she was ready to believe anything, just to avoid being disappointed again.
After struggling to drag the suitcase to the door, she paused for a second, put her hand on the handle, as if she was about to say something. But she thought better of it, flung the door open and walked out, without a backward glance.
I stayed standing in the middle of the room, staring at the closed door. The faint scent of her perfume still hung in the air, and her last words rang in my ears: “Oliver is not that kind of person!”
I slowly sank into a chair, feeling exhaustion wash over me like a heavy wave. Everything had happened too fast, too finally. And now I would have to learn to live with it – without Victoria, without future plans, without illusions…
Later I learned what happened next when Victoria went to see Oliver. Oliver opened the door, surprised by the early visitor. On the threshold stood Victoria with two suitcases, her face glowing with joy, her eyes bright with expectation. He froze, unable to say a word. The only thought in his head was: “How could she have got it so wrong?”
He had been sure it was all long over. When Victoria started seeing me, Oliver finally sighed with relief. Now he could return to London calmly, live here with his wife, without worrying about surprise calls, tears and accusations. He even mentally thanked Victoria for finding someone else – it solved all his problems in one go.
Yes, he had phoned her and tried to make it clear that everything had changed, and even suggested meeting on neutral ground, but it was just a formality!
And now she was at his door with her things, clearly expecting more than just a chat. Oliver stepped back without meaning to, trying to gather his thoughts.
“Oliver!” Victoria cried as soon as she saw him. “I’ve made up my mind. I’m here, and we will finally be together!”
Her voice sounded so sure, as if there could be no other way. She stepped forward, but Oliver instinctively raised his hand to stop her.
“Victoria, hold on…” he started, trying to speak as gently as he could. “You probably don’t know everything.”
She frowned, the smile slowly fading from her face.
“What do you mean? We agreed to meet and talk it all over!”
Oliver took a deep breath, knowing the moment had to come.
“I’m married, Victoria. For two years now. My wife and I are very happy.”
Victoria froze, her eyes widening in shock. She was silent for several seconds, as if she couldn’t believe what she had heard. Then her face twisted – her expression mixed panic, hurt and anger.
“What are you saying?” she whispered, shaking her head. “That can’t be… You phoned me, said everything had changed!”
“I phoned to say a proper goodbye,” Oliver replied quietly. “I wanted to explain that time has passed, that we each have our own lives now. But you must have taken it the wrong way.”
Victoria stepped back, her hands shaking. She clenched her fists, trying to control herself, but emotions were overwhelming her.
“You… you lied to me the whole time!” she shouted, her voice shaking with rage. “How could you do that? I gave up everything for you!”
Oliver felt irritation rising in him. He didn’t want a scene, didn’t want to explain himself, but Victoria clearly wasn’t leaving without a confrontation.
“I never promised you anything,” he said firmly. “You decided on your own that we would be together. I just didn’t want to hurt you, so I was careful with my words. But now it’s clear, isn’t it?”
Victoria cried out, grabbed one of the suitcases and threw it on the floor with force. Things scattered across the hallway, but she didn’t care. She shouted, accused, demanded answers, her voice getting louder and louder.
Oliver had to politely but firmly show her out to the landing. He closed the door, hoping that would end the matter. But Victoria didn’t stop – she banged on the door, shouted, called his name. Neighbors started peeking out of their flats, someone coughed in annoyance, someone loudly complained.
An hour later, when Victoria’s shouting grew even louder, and the neighbors seriously threatened to call the police, she finally left. Before going, she turned, looked at Oliver’s flat door and through her tears shouted:
“I’ll be back! You’ll regret this!”
Oliver closed his eyes, feeling tiredness come over him. He knew this wasn’t the end. Victoria was stubborn, and if she had set her mind to something, she wouldn’t give up easily.
He went into the living room, sat on the sofa and thought. He needed to take action quickly. Staying in this flat was no longer possible – Victoria could come back, cause a scene, disturb the neighbors. Oliver got out his phone and opened a property website.
“I need to sell the flat and find a new one,” he decided. “Somewhere on the other side of the city”…
After that, Victoria walked the streets, not noticing anything around her. Tears filled her eyes, bits of thoughts whirled in her head, her heart felt heavy and empty. She still couldn’t fully grasp what had happened. In her mind Oliver was supposed to meet her with open arms, say he had been waiting for this moment, that they would finally be together. But reality had turned out to be quite different – harsh and unforgiving.
She wandered the city for a long time, trying to pull herself together. Her feet led her to my house. Victoria stopped at the entrance, wiped her tears, fixed her hair – she wanted to look at least a bit composed. Taking a deep breath, she went up to the right floor and hesitantly rang the bell.
I didn’t open the door straight away. When I finally appeared in the doorway, my face stayed cold and distant. I looked at Victoria in silence, making no move to ask her in.
“Edward, please,” she began in a shaky voice. “I know what I’ve done. I understand how foolish and cruel I’ve been. But I… I want to make it right.”
She stopped, trying to find the right words. Tears shone in her eyes again.
“I will never mention Oliver’s name again,” she went on, looking me straight in the eye. “I promise. All this was a mistake. I see now that only with you can I be happy. Please, give me another chance.”
Her voice sounded sincere, almost desperate. She really believed what she was saying – at that moment it seemed to her that if I forgave her, everything would be alright.
I slowly shook my head. No, I wasn’t going to fall for this a second time!
“Victoria,” I said quietly, “you already made your decision. A few hours ago you were standing in my flat with suitcases and saying you were going to him. You were certain of your choice.”
“I was wrong then!” she interrupted. “I didn’t know what I was doing! I was emotional! I…”
I sighed, ran a hand through my hair. It wasn’t easy for me, but I knew for sure: I couldn’t let emotions rule me again.
“You didn’t just leave me – you left for him. You made your choice, and I accepted it. And now, when things didn’t work out, you want to come back?”
“Yes!” Victoria cried. “Because I love you. Only you.”
I was silent for a few seconds, then gave a small smile and said firmly:
“I don’t believe your words are sincere anymore. Goodbye.”
Victoria felt everything inside her break. I looked at her calmly, without anger, but there was no doubt in my eyes. I really didn’t believe her anymore.
“Please…” she whispered, but her voice shook and stopped.
“I’m sorry,” I said. “But this will be better for both of us.”
I closed the door, leaving Victoria standing in the empty hallway. She stood still for a few more seconds, then slowly sank down onto the step, covered her face with her hands and cried. This time the tears weren’t from hurt or anger – from the bitter realization that she had lost both Oliver and me, and now she didn’t know how to go on…
As I close this entry, the lesson I have learned is clear: one must guard against building hopes on illusions and old affections that no longer hold, as it risks wounding those who offer genuine care and leaves one facing regret and emptiness alone. True peace comes from facing facts squarely and choosing honesty over what might have been.I sat down to write this entry in my diary because the events that have unfolded have shaken me to the core, and I need to make sense of them. It began with what my friend Sophie described to me about her visit to Victoria before the planned wedding. Sophie entered the room and paused on the threshold. Before her stood Victoria in her wedding dress, and she looked incredible. The gown perfectly highlighted her figure, and her eyes shone with a quiet, almost ethereal happiness. Sophie couldn’t contain her joy:
“Oh my goodness, you are glowing!” she exclaimed, unable to tear her gaze from her friend. “I am so happy for you! At last, you have been able to move on and open your heart to new emotions, forgetting about Oliver! You are really something!”
Victoria winced slightly, and her smile disappeared immediately. She quickly began to unfasten the dress, trying not to look at Sophie.
“I’d better take it off,” she muttered, deftly undoing the small hooks on the side. “There are only two weeks left until the big day. If something happens to the dress, we won’t be able to find another one like it.”
Sophie bit her lip. She immediately realized she had said too much. Why bring up Oliver? Now that a decent man had finally entered Victoria’s life, bringing up the past was completely out of place! Oliver wasn’t worth a single tear from Victoria – especially after everything he had put her through!
There was a time when Victoria had sincerely believed he was the one, her true love. The girl thought their relationship was serious and would last! But gradually everything started to fall apart. First he started pulling away, finding reasons not to see her, then openly criticizing her choices, her friends, her dreams. He convinced her to abandon a promising project at work, talked her out of an internship abroad, and then insisted that she change her job entirely.
Victoria’s family didn’t understand what was going on with her. They saw how she was changing, how she was losing herself, but they couldn’t do anything. Attempts to talk turned into rows – Oliver had persuaded Victoria that her family just didn’t accept him and were trying to ruin their “perfect love”. The conflict escalated, and at one point Victoria almost stopped speaking to her parents.
Then he vanished. He just up and left, without explaining a thing, not even leaving a goodbye note. All that was left was a deep emotional scar – and the child that Victoria decided to keep, come what may.
Now, watching as her friend hastily removed the wedding dress, Sophie felt a sharp pang of guilt. She had only wanted to share in Victoria’s happiness, to see her joyful. And she certainly hadn’t meant to awaken painful memories…
Now little Oliver was four years old. He was a lively, inquisitive child who constantly asked questions about everything under the sun. Sometimes he tried to figure out why the sky is blue, other times he wondered where the clouds go, or he excitedly examined bugs on a walk. The teachers at the nursery often commented on his cleverness: Oliver picked up new things fast, easily remembered poems and listened with interest to long stories.
The boy spent nearly all his time with his grandparents – Victoria’s parents. They were happy to take care of their grandson and did everything to help him grow. It was they who chose a nursery that taught English, they who took the little lad to the swimming pool, they who signed him up for dance lessons. Victoria visited her son a few times a week, but never stayed more than an hour.
The reason was simple and painful. Little Oliver looked strikingly like his father. The same dark curly hair, the same eye shape, the same slightly cheeky smile. Every time she looked at her son, Victoria felt like she was back in the past – in those days when she believed their family would be happy. She loved the boy with all her heart, was proud of his successes, delighted in every smile. But with the love always came a sharp, piercing pain. As soon as she picked her son up or looked into his eyes, tears would start to well up. She would turn away, pretend to fix his clothes or search for something in her bag, and then quietly cry once Oliver was out of sight.
One evening Victoria went to collect Oliver from her parents’ house. The boy was sitting on the carpet putting a puzzle together, concentrating with furrowed brows. Seeing his mum, he jumped up happily and ran over to her.
“Mum, look!” he pulled her to the carpet. “I’m almost done. There’s a house and a tree, and here… here will be a dog!”
Victoria knelt down next to him, trying to smile.
“Very nice,” she said, patting his head. “You’re doing well, putting it all together so carefully.”
Oliver paused for a moment, then looked up at her:
“Mum, where’s my dad? In nursery all the other kids have a dad, but I don’t…”
Victoria froze. Everything inside her tightened, but she tried to keep a steady voice:
“I don’t know, son. Dad is far away at the moment. But he thinks about you, truly.”
“Why doesn’t he phone?” Oliver frowned, as if trying to work out a tough problem. “I would tell him that I learned to tie my own shoelaces!”
“He… he’s just very busy,” Victoria mumbled, feeling a lump in her throat. “But I’m sure he’s proud of you.”
The boy thought for a second, then nodded as if accepting her explanation, and went back to the puzzle.
“Alright. Then I’ll finish this house, and Dad will see how clever I am!”
Victoria sat beside him, watching, and silently swallowed her tears. She wanted to say something more to comfort him, but the words wouldn’t come. Instead she just reached out and stroked his hair again, breathing in the smell of children’s shampoo and trying to hold on to this moment – the moment when her son was close, happy and trusting, despite all the questions she had no answers for.
Despite everything, Victoria kept thinking about Oliver. Deep in her soul she continued to make excuses for him. Maybe something awful had happened to him? Maybe he got into trouble and can’t contact anyone? These thoughts helped her keep going, not fall into a pit of despair.
Her loved ones tried more than once to talk to her honestly. Her mum gently suggested that she shouldn’t live in the past, that she needed to focus on her son and her own life. Friends said outright: “He left you. It’s time to accept that and move on!” But Victoria refused to listen to their points. She argued heatedly, spoke about how happy they had been, recalled the promises he had made. The arguments often ended with her closing herself off, and the others, sighing, backing down.
Meanwhile, Victoria wasn’t sitting around doing nothing. From time to time she checked social media, called old places where he might show up, even posted messages asking for help in finding him. All without result! But she couldn’t – or wouldn’t – accept the idea that Oliver had simply left of his own accord and wasn’t planning to come back.
Then, after five long years, someone entered Victoria’s life who managed to thaw her heart. It happened almost by chance: they met at the birthday party of a mutual friend. I, Edward, immediately caught her attention. I was… reliable, there’s no other way to put it. I was genuine! Sincere, kind, caring… The best!
From the very first meetings Victoria felt that with me she could be herself. I didn’t demand fake cheerfulness or a permanent smile from her. If she was tired, I simply suggested going home. If she wanted to be quiet, I didn’t try to make her talk. I turned out to be exactly the man she seemed to have been looking for: serious, steady – and, most importantly, sincerely in love.
My feelings showed even in small ways: in how I found out in advance what coffee she likes, how I remembered the names of her colleagues and asked about their affairs, how I quietly took care of everyday matters. I was ready to carry her in my arms, and Victoria, there’s no point hiding it, made full use of those feelings.
What touched her especially was how I got along with little Oliver. At our first meeting the boy looked at me warily, holding his mum’s hand. But I surprised her even then! I crouched down to be at Oliver’s level, and asked what cartoons he liked. Half an hour later we were already building with blocks together, and Oliver was excitedly showing me his favorite toys.
Over time I became a regular visitor at Victoria’s parents’ house, where Oliver lived. I took the boy to the park, taught him to ride a bike, read him stories before bed. And one day, when Victoria found us drawing together, I calmly said: “I would like to be a real father to him. If you let me, I’m ready to adopt Oliver.”
Sophie was genuinely pleased for her friend. She saw how Victoria was slowly changing: a sparkle came into her eyes, the constant shadow of worry left her face, and her smile became real, not strained. But that day Sophie made an annoying slip – she accidentally touched an old wound by mentioning Oliver in the conversation. Now she only hoped that Victoria wasn’t too upset and wouldn’t sink into gloom.
But the girl acted surprisingly calm.
“I have grown up,” she said with a light smile, carefully laying the dress on the bed. “And I clearly see that my feelings for Oliver must stay in the past. Sometimes I even regret naming my son after him. I was foolish, I didn’t want to listen to anyone’s advice… How did you all put up with me?”
Sophie carefully touched her hand:
“Are you thinking of taking Oliver to live with you instead of with your parents?”
“Yes,” Victoria replied, becoming serious at once. “Edward is especially keen on this. He even suggested changing the boy’s name. He says it will be easier for me. Anyway, we’ll have to redo the birth certificate once the adoption is done.”
She paused, watching the raindrops slide down the window pane.
“You know, I used to be afraid that little Oliver would always remind me of the past. But now I see I was wrong. He is my son, and he deserves a proper childhood, with two parents who love him! His grandparents are wonderful, of course, but they can’t take the place of parents! And Edward understands that. He truly wants to be a father to him! If you could see how much he has bonded with the boy!”
“Sounds like a good plan!” Sophie said, brightening up. “You could ask your son what name he prefers. That might help him adjust to the changes more quickly.”
“I’m not sure. I still don’t know what to do. There’s time, we’ll think it over.”
In truth, Victoria was not being entirely honest. She still loved Oliver, and that love had not disappeared. But this love had not brought her anything good. Her parents were refusing her contact with her son more and more often, because the girl nearly cried at every visit, frightening the little boy. Friends no longer wanted to hear about her problems and were secretly questioning her sanity. So it was time to let go of the past and concentrate on the present.
Like the wedding, for instance.
But it was terribly hard!
I, Edward, was without doubt a good person, but… I was not Oliver. Victoria did not have deep feelings for me, she was only using my affection for her own purposes.
If Oliver came back… She would give anything to be with him…
There will be no wedding! – Victoria said with burning eyes, almost dancing around. – We are splitting up, like ships passing in the night!
I looked at Victoria in confusion, trying to take in her words. There was only a week left until the wedding – we had already talked about the menu, picked the flowers, sent out invitations. Everything seemed so real, so close… And now she is saying there will be no wedding?
“What do you mean ‘no wedding’?” I tried to understand if my bride was serious or just playing a very stupid joke. “Victoria, what has happened? Explain it properly.”
But Victoria just waved away my questions. She paced the room, grabbing things from shelves and throwing them into an open suitcase. Her eyes were shining, a smile played on her lips, so unusual, so… genuine.
“Oliver has returned!” she burst out, not looking at me. There was such real happiness in her voice that everything inside me shattered. “He arrived yesterday, we talked things over… I could hardly believe it was true at first!”
She finally stopped, turned to me, and there was no trace of regret in her gaze – only joy and eagerness.
“I am thankful to you for the last six months,” she went on, softening her tone a bit. “It was peaceful and comfortable with you… You are a wonderful person, Edward. But I never truly loved you. Now that I have a chance at real happiness, I can’t let it slip away.”
I felt a cold emptiness spreading in my chest. Oliver. Always Oliver. The same man Victoria spoke of with such adoration that I couldn’t help feeling like an outsider. I knew she still thought about him, but I had hoped that time and our life together would change her feelings.
“Have you spoken to him already?” I finally managed to say, my voice sounding choked, as if I couldn’t get enough air. “What did he say? What excuse has he come up with this time?”
“He didn’t make any excuses,” Victoria answered rather sharply. “He just said that he realized what a mistake he had made. That all this time he thought only of me!”
She turned away again, continuing to pack, and I stayed where I was, feeling the world around me slowly drain of color.
“We spoke on the phone,” she continued, sorting through things in a drawer, checking if anything important was left behind. “His parents forced him to study abroad, and he couldn’t tell me he was leaving. Can you believe it? All this time he thought only of me, he just didn’t have a way to get in touch. But now everything will be fine – we will be together and live a long happy life!”
Victoria’s memory went back to that phone call with Oliver – their first after the long separation. Oliver’s voice sounded agitated, a bit broken:
“Victoria, I know this all looks awful. But understand – my parents put me in a position where I had no choice. They said: either study in New York, or they cut me off. I tried to fight it, honestly I did… But they blocked all my cards, cut off my access to money. I didn’t even have my own phone!”
“Why didn’t you call me even once?” Victoria’s voice shook, but she did her best not to show her hurt.
“I couldn’t. What would I have said to you? That I was weak and gave in to my parents?”
Listening to his jumbled explanations then, Victoria felt warmth flooding through her. All the hurts, all the bitterness of the past months seemed to melt away in his voice. She suddenly understood that she had been waiting for this call the whole time – every day, every hour.
“Now everything will be different,” Oliver went on. “I quit the course, came back. And I’m not going anywhere else.”
Those words were echoing in her mind as she stood before me now.
She went quiet for a moment, quickly looked around the room as if to make sure she hadn’t forgotten anything. Only then did she notice how pale I had gone. My face was almost white, and my stare was fixed on one spot, as if looking right through her.
“Don’t worry,” Victoria added, a little more gently but with no doubt in her voice. “I have already told everyone the wedding is off. I explained it all, asked them not to bother you. Of course people will feel sorry for you, but you are strong, you’ll get through it.”
She went over to the suitcase, pulled it to her and straightened the handle, as if that was the most important thing at the moment. Then she looked at me again, and there was no regret or hesitation in her eyes.
“And please, don’t phone me, don’t send pointless messages and don’t leave voicemails,” she said firmly, almost like an order. “My decision is final, and I won’t change it no matter what!”
She grabbed the suitcase, wobbled a bit from the weight, but straightened up right away and headed for the door, as if afraid that any delay might weaken her determination.
I stood in the middle of the room, feeling everything inside me tighten with pain and confusion. I took a deep breath, trying to keep control. I wanted to shout, demand answers, but I held back – I didn’t want to seem weak or desperate. I clenched my fists, then slowly relaxed them, trying to speak calmly, almost matter-of-factly:
“Are you sure you’re not rushing?” I said, watching Victoria closely.
She stopped at the door, holding the suitcase handle, but didn’t turn around. Her shoulders were tight, her fingers gripping the leather handle hard.
“What if he doesn’t want to start things up again?” I continued, stepping closer. “Or won’t accept his son? Or perhaps he has already asked you to marry him?”
Victoria spun around sharply. Her face was flushed with excitement and annoyance. She took a few steps toward me, as if she wanted to prove something, make me understand.
“He asked me to come for a serious discussion!” she blurted out. “That’s enough! And don’t try to make him look bad – Oliver is not that kind of person!”
Her voice shook on the last words, but she pulled herself together right away, stood tall and pulled the suitcase to the door once more.
“You could at least help,” she muttered under her breath, struggling to lift the heavy case.
I stepped forward without thinking, as if I really was going to help, but then stopped. Why help someone who had crushed my feelings? I could see clearly that in her mind she was already far away, with Oliver. Her eyes showed confidence, almost a high: a new life full of happiness and love was about to start. She was obviously picturing how Oliver would greet her with a smile, tell her everything would be okay, that they would finally be together.
But in reality it was quite different. Oliver, who had asked her to come for a “serious talk”, had no intention of proposing or swearing everlasting love. He only wanted to explain himself, close the old chapter so he could start a new one – but without Victoria. Especially as he was already married.
And Victoria, lost in her fantasies, didn’t see what was obvious. She had waited so long for this moment that now she was ready to believe anything, just to avoid being disappointed again.
After struggling to drag the suitcase to the door, she paused for a second, put her hand on the handle, as if she was about to say something. But she thought better of it, flung the door open and walked out, without a backward glance.
I stayed standing in the middle of the room, staring at the closed door. The faint scent of her perfume still hung in the air, and her last words rang in my ears: “Oliver is not that kind of person!”
I slowly sank into a chair, feeling exhaustion wash over me like a heavy wave. Everything had happened too fast, too finally. And now I would have to learn to live with it – without Victoria, without future plans, without illusions…
Later I learned what happened next when Victoria went to see Oliver. Oliver opened the door, surprised by the early visitor. On the threshold stood Victoria with two suitcases, her face glowing with joy, her eyes bright with expectation. He froze, unable to say a word. The only thought in his head was: “How could she have got it so wrong?”
He had been sure it was all long over. When Victoria started seeing me, Oliver finally sighed with relief. Now he could return to London calmly, live here with his wife, without worrying about surprise calls, tears and accusations. He even mentally thanked Victoria for finding someone else – it solved all his problems in one go.
Yes, he had phoned her and tried to make it clear that everything had changed, and even suggested meeting on neutral ground, but it was just a formality!
And now she was at his door with her things, clearly expecting more than just a chat. Oliver stepped back without meaning to, trying to gather his thoughts.
“Oliver!” Victoria cried as soon as she saw him. “I’ve made up my mind. I’m here, and we will finally be together!”
Her voice sounded so sure, as if there could be no other way. She stepped forward, but Oliver instinctively raised his hand to stop her.
“Victoria, hold on…” he started, trying to speak as gently as he could. “You probably don’t know everything.”
She frowned, the smile slowly fading from her face.
“What do you mean? We agreed to meet and talk it all over!”
Oliver took a deep breath, knowing the moment had to come.
“I’m married, Victoria. For two years now. My wife and I are very happy.”
Victoria froze, her eyes widening in shock. She was silent for several seconds, as if she couldn’t believe what she had heard. Then her face twisted – her expression mixed panic, hurt and anger.
“What are you saying?” she whispered, shaking her head. “That can’t be… You phoned me, said everything had changed!”
“I phoned to say a proper goodbye,” Oliver replied quietly. “I wanted to explain that time has passed, that we each have our own lives now. But you must have taken it the wrong way.”
Victoria stepped back, her hands shaking. She clenched her fists, trying to control herself, but emotions were overwhelming her.
“You… you lied to me the whole time!” she shouted, her voice shaking with rage. “How could you do that? I gave up everything for you!”
Oliver felt irritation rising in him. He didn’t want a scene, didn’t want to explain himself, but Victoria clearly wasn’t leaving without a confrontation.
“I never promised you anything,” he said firmly. “You decided on your own that we would be together. I just didn’t want to hurt you, so I was careful with my words. But now it’s clear, isn’t it?”
Victoria cried out, grabbed one of the suitcases and threw it on the floor with force. Things scattered across the hallway, but she didn’t care. She shouted, accused, demanded answers, her voice getting louder and louder.
Oliver had to politely but firmly show her out to the landing. He closed the door, hoping that would end the matter. But Victoria didn’t stop – she banged on the door, shouted, called his name. Neighbors started peeking out of their flats, someone coughed in annoyance, someone loudly complained.
An hour later, when Victoria’s shouting grew even louder, and the neighbors seriously threatened to call the police, she finally left. Before going, she turned, looked at Oliver’s flat door and through her tears shouted:
“I’ll be back! You’ll regret this!”
Oliver closed his eyes, feeling tiredness come over him. He knew this wasn’t the end. Victoria was stubborn, and if she had set her mind to something, she wouldn’t give up easily.
He went into the living room, sat on the sofa and thought. He needed to take action quickly. Staying in this flat was no longer possible – Victoria could come back, cause a scene, disturb the neighbors. Oliver got out his phone and opened a property website.
“I need to sell the flat and find a new one,” he decided. “Somewhere on the other side of the city”…
After that, Victoria walked the streets, not noticing anything around her. Tears filled her eyes, bits of thoughts whirled in her head, her heart felt heavy and empty. She still couldn’t fully grasp what had happened. In her mind Oliver was supposed to meet her with open arms, say he had been waiting for this moment, that they would finally be together. But reality had turned out to be quite different – harsh and unforgiving.
She wandered the city for a long time, trying to pull herself together. Her feet led her to my house. Victoria stopped at the entrance, wiped her tears, fixed her hair – she wanted to look at least a bit composed. Taking a deep breath, she went up to the right floor and hesitantly rang the bell.
I didn’t open the door straight away. When I finally appeared in the doorway, my face stayed cold and distant. I looked at Victoria in silence, making no move to ask her in.
“Edward, please,” she began in a shaky voice. “I know what I’ve done. I understand how foolish and cruel I’ve been. But I… I want to make it right.”
She stopped, trying to find the right words. Tears shone in her eyes again.
“I will never mention Oliver’s name again,” she went on, looking me straight in the eye. “I promise. All this was a mistake. I see now that only with you can I be happy. Please, give me another chance.”
Her voice sounded sincere, almost desperate. She really believed what she was saying – at that moment it seemed to her that if I forgave her, everything would be alright.
I slowly shook my head. No, I wasn’t going to fall for this a second time!
“Victoria,” I said quietly, “you already made your decision. A few hours ago you were standing in my flat with suitcases and saying you were going to him. You were certain of your choice.”
“I was wrong then!” she interrupted. “I didn’t know what I was doing! I was emotional! I…”
I sighed, ran a hand through my hair. It wasn’t easy for me, but I knew for sure: I couldn’t let emotions rule me again.
“You didn’t just leave me – you left for him. You made your choice, and I accepted it. And now, when things didn’t work out, you want to come back?”
“Yes!” Victoria cried. “Because I love you. Only you.”
I was silent for a few seconds, then gave a small smile and said firmly:
“I don’t believe your words are sincere anymore. Goodbye.”
Victoria felt everything inside her break. I looked at her calmly, without anger, but there was no doubt in my eyes. I really didn’t believe her anymore.
“Please…” she whispered, but her voice shook and stopped.
“I’m sorry,” I said. “But this will be better for both of us.”
I closed the door, leaving Victoria standing in the empty hallway. She stood still for a few more seconds, then slowly sank down onto the step, covered her face with her hands and cried. This time the tears weren’t from hurt or anger – from the bitter realization that she had lost both Oliver and me, and now she didn’t know how to go on…
As I close this entry, the lesson I have learned is clear: one must guard against building hopes on illusions and old affections that no longer hold, as it risks wounding those who offer genuine care and leaves one facing regret and emptiness alone. True peace comes from facing facts squarely and choosing honesty over what might have been.
